I Tried

I tried real hard not to doze off while attending mandatory drill this morning. I did everything I could to stay awake, except stand up and do jumping jacks. I did pretty good, too.

Well except for that 10 second spell where my eyes closed, my head started to nod and the beginnings of a snore escaped my sinuses. I caught myself and jerked awake before the instructor said something. My firefighter was just getting ready to kick me when I came out of it.

It's my bad, it's just that a darkened classroom, a boring pre-packaged delivery, covering material we have heard 15 times over the past two years makes it tough to stay awake. Just how many ways can "wildfires can be driven by, topography, weather or fuel" be said?

I should have had another cup of coffee before class, poor planning on my part caused me to run out of time. Might I suggest allowing coffee in the classroom, at least for this one class? I think it might help.

*****
Have a great weekend, mine starts this morning.

Thanks for reading,
Schmoe

I Can't Remember

I can't remember the last time -

• someone climbed on the roof of the station and threw a bucket of water on an unsuspecting target.
•  someone was strapped to a backboard and hung in the hosetower
• someone had I.V. tubing routed through the ceiling so that saline dripped on them as they slept.
• someone had their bedding hidden from them while they were on a call
• someone pulled, then hid the fuses for the air conditioning unit on a hot summer night
• someone had to mop up the water down in the training chief's office because a water fight got out of hand
• someone was thrown down the pole hole
• someone had a bucket of ice water thrown on them as they showered
• someone had their towel kyped as they showered
• someone had their seat armor-alled so they slid around when the rig made a sharp turn
• someone had grease or charcoal applied to the headband of their helmet
• someone was "decorated" as they slept in a recliner
• someone removed all of the toilet paper from the dispensers and from the supply room

Now it seems that most of the crap that goes on is more psychological in nature or involves  fake facebook accounts, photo-shop or tweeting.

Of course some of the stuff that happened way before my time would now land you in jail or at least the unemployment line.

The most infamous words in the K.B.F.P.D. were "There aren't enough of you bastards to..."

As an example:  "There aren't enough of you bastards ti paint my ass!" 

Guess what. There WERE enough of those bastards. Most of them were WWII or Korean war vets. They were tough as nails and more than willing to show someone how few people were really needed to hold someone down, access their ass and apply some paint. If they were really caring individuals, they might ask what the wife's favorite color was.

I'm glad that stuff was gone well before I showed up. I do kind of miss throwing water from the roof of the station though.

Thanks for reading,
Schmoe

Joseph R. Schmoe's Pic Of The Week

It was awesome.

Everybody stopped to watch. Luckily, I had a camera.

Thanks for stopping by,
Schmoe