Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Facebook Faux-Pas II

"Wheres Jones?"

"He called off"

"Really, I talked to him yesterday, he seemed fine"

"Lets check his face book page, maybe he posted whats wrong"

Jone's last post - "It's 2am, I'm hammered and I'm up 200 bucks. What a country"

An awkward pause then much discussion ensued. I don't know the outcome for sure.

Oops. Yet another reason not to be on face book. Of course, you don't need technology to get in trouble. This happened to me:

It's a Friday night, about 9 P.M.

"Schmoe here"

"Hey Joe, It's Chief Consensus. Sorry to do this to you, but Capt. Narcissus called off and no one is signed up for tomorrow. I have to force hire you"

"Are you kidding me? Shit. I am supposed to teach at the academy tomorrow. There's no way they are going to find a replacement at this late date." I am rapidly approaching a line that I shouldn't cross. I wisely decide to shut up, get the info and terminate the conversation.

I call the drillmaster at the academy and tell him I got forced. He isn't happy, but what can I do. I'm kind of pissed because I know Narcissus is probably fine and just wanted the day off.

Later on the following week, I return home from running errands and who do I find in my kitchen? Junior Narcissus. He and number one son are friends and go to the same school.

"Hey Junior, how was your weekend? Did you guys do anything fun?"

"Yeah Mr. Schmoe, we went camping at Pismo and took the quads and stuff. It was really awesome."

I could have made life pretty miserable for Narcissus and ratted him out. He would have had one of those decisive moments and would have had to decide whether to tell the truth or lie like a rug. As I am not a rat, I chose to let it go and take random shots at him when I get the chance.

Sorry Narcissus, I can't work for you, I've got something planned. Sorry Narcissus, I'll get that inventory report to you right away, I don't know how it ended up at station 3.

Because Narcissus put his needs above everyone elses, he inconvenienced me, 30 students, the drillmaster and some other guy that had to teach the academy. Strong work nucklehead, I'm glad your time is so much more valuable than ours..

Thanks for reading,



  1. Big kudos to you , Joe! A lie will always come back around and bite you in the private area!! As for facebook, so many of the guys and gals here put stuff up on thier pages that border on against policy, conduct unbecoming, etc. the day will come, soon, when the powers that be start to check those social medias on a regular basis and then, watch out!!
    Great post once again, Capt!
    Stay safe, Gia

  2. I agree with your approach.

    Taking random shots over an indeterminate time frame with no real end in sight is far more satisfying than being a rat. And, generally, safer.

    To a point.

    Gotta know when to say when and call things even. But you already know all that.

  3. annoying. I'm sure you can work this to your advantage over time; nothin like having a little dirt on someone.

  4. Dear Captain Schmoe,
    There's an entire blog site called Cops 2.0 that talks about all the social networking sites and how to professionalize them, or limit them to one purpose or another, protect privacy and reputation, and all of that.

    I still think it's a big time-waster, but this person seems to have it figured out. They've got some good posts over there. And given that all the crooks and arsonists seem to have web pages now, it might be good for some people (not me) to get into it.

    Ann T.